You've Gotta Laugh A Little

After losing Matthew, God knew our whole family needed laughter and a lot of it.  Zane was the antidote.  Before he could talk, he was making us laugh with the expressions on his face or the predicaments he would get him self into.  Once he found his words, though, I can't tell you how many people have asked me if I'm writing down the things he's said because I could write a book on them.  Unfortunately, I didn't write most of them down, but one day for kicks, I went back through Facebook and took some of the funny things I'd posted that he'd said and wrote them down in my journal.  I thought I'd put them here, in case you need a smile today.  This boy can provide you with one any day.  

12/22/14 (3 years old)

Playing pirates, his pirates look to the sky and say, "Oh no! What ifs dat? I'm sca-owed! It's an angel.  Den dee angel said on dem, do not be afwayed.  I bwing you new uff gwate joy."  

5/10/15 (3 years old - Playing Batman with Brad)

Z: Oh no! Batman is sick!  Call an ambulance!  The paramedics will know what to do!

Later that day he picked up 2 toys that were identical and announced that one of them had been caught in a replicating machine.  

12/25/15 - (4 years old - When he got a second toy that he'd already received as a gift)

Z- "Look!  I got a duplicate!" 

1/8/16 (4 years old - saying prayers)

Z- God, hurry up... get my hell outta here!  The only way for me to marry girlfriend Chloe is to get my hell outta here. 

1/12/16 (4 years old - waking up for school)

Z - I want to stay here in bed!  This is the only place I can be myself. 

2/23/16 (as we sat down together at a restaurant)

Z- Isn't it nice to have the whole family together? 

(Later, watching Good Dinosaur and sees a shooting star)

Z - I didn't know stars could fly.

Me - Yeah, they're called shooting stars.  

Z -  Is it kind of like a meteor?

Me - ... Yes... Yes it is...

5/26/16 (4 years old)

Z- I love you more than Pete

Me - Who is Pete?

Z - You know, for the love of Pete!

7/5/16 (4 years old)

Z - Mom, can you get me some pants?  I accidentally got some pee on my deviously charming pants.

later that day, playing ABC Mouse

Z - Mom, I'm making excellent progress.  Aren't you impressed?

8/14/16 (4 years old)

Me - Good morning doll face

Z - Good morning whale face.

Me - Why did you call me that?

Z - Because you called me dolphin face.  

11/6/16 (5 years old)

Z - Christmas is right around the corner?

Me - Yup

Z - Can we move our house around the corner?

1/12/17 - (5 years old - Waking him up for school, the dog jumped on the bed)

Z - Shelby, get off me! Can't you see I'm dreaming?

 4/16/17 (5 years old)

Z: Mia, never put giant underwear on toxic gas. It's weird and dangerous.  

Mia: ... 

5/17/17(5 years old)

Z - Mom, when I'm grown up, do I get to say bad words like you?


Z - Mom, can you cancel my 12 o'clock?


Z - Mom, my charms never end.  You know what that means?  It means I'm full of curiosity.  

5/20/17 (5 years old - as he has to get up and get dressed for church)

Z - Mom, I've lost my joy.  The joy fell right out of headquarters.  

5/23/17 (5 years old - his career goals)

1. Snake Killer  (Hazel (the dog) will be his "Honorary Bull Dog")

2. Sheps Chef

3. NOT a teacher - "because teacher stuff is BO-RING!"

4. A robot maker and Hayley is going to be his boss who tells him how to make the robots. 

5. A mad scientist and Hayley will be his boss for this, too.  

6/17/17 (5 years old)

Z - You should never eat a baby, wanna know why?

Me - Ummm, why?

Z - It could grow up to be your friend someday!

6/19/17(5 years old)

Me - Go put on your pajamas.

Z - Pajamas aren't very cool, with all due respect.  

7/6/17 (5 years old) 

Z - Mom, I love you. You never smell like a skunk.  

7/10/17 (5 years old) 

Z- I'm tired of this savagery!  

7/16/17 (5 years old) 

-Out of nowhere-

Z- The elemental masters have never seen the likes of the anacondrai.

---------- later------- 

Z- Did you know the deep sea divers died in the bathtub?

Family- how did they die (expecting him they drowned) 

Z- they were shot.  


Hayley: Zane, I didn’t get the part of Ariel in The Little Mermaid  

Z: what part did you get? 

Hayley: Flounder

Z: Oh. That’s not so bad.  

H: It’s a boy! 

Z: Gasp! (Literally said GASP) What are we going to do about this? 


Z writing a book about monsters:  

ugh. I can’t find the stapler. I’m so triggered!  

Z: Mom, my classmates are going to be ambushed when they read the ending of this book.  

He later tried to sell his book to a teacher at school for $4  



I'll keep adding to this, just for my own records, and so as people ask me if I'm writing this stuff down, I can finally say YES! :) 

Everyday is an adventure with Zane.  You can be sure that something he is going to say will keep you laughing for awhile.  Not everyone gets him.  Not everyone can stand his incessant chatter.  I'll be honest, it will wear you out.  I have felt that they could put him in interrogation rooms sometimes and the suspect would just confess to get a break from the noise.  A lot of the time, I don't even know what in the world he's talking about.  He talks about YouTube videos I've never seen, or games I've never played, and characters I've never heard of.  His spirit is bright though.  He loves people.  He loves words.  He loves to perform.  I hope nobody squelches that.  I hope he is always able to stand strong in who he is and isn't held down by what society says children are supposed to be.